Those two things are so, so easily confused. It's going to hurt even if you say all the nice things you should say — that you're still going to be his friend, that you're going to try not to Instagram this girl obsessively, etc. The Dating Nerd is a shadowy figure whose whereabouts and identifying details remain unknown. If I were a betting man, I'd bet that your crush on this girl is just like any other crush. So what do I do here? We ran into each other at a party. But sometimes, you have to do inadvisable things for love. Maybe this is your future wife, or muse, or whatever it is that you're looking for. But it's largely a matter of compartmentalizing. This conversation will not go well. Tom found out, and he never forgave me. You're saying, "screw you and your silly emotions, I've got to get laid. I suspected that she had a low-key crush on me. You're always going to feel weird when you see your ex, at least a little bit.
Accordingly, you should treat this like any other important decision, which is to say that you should get as much information as possible. About a year after she dumped Tom abruptly, leaving him a sniveling wreck, I discovered that I was correct. Which is that people never really get over significant romantic relationships. You get a new and even prettier girlfriend, or hang out with your friends more, or get into jiu jitsu or knitting. I'm kind of obsessed. There was only one weird thing about her, which is that I would occasionally catch her looking at me a little funny. That's the truth of the situation. Or is she just an attractive person who finds you attractive, too? I found out about this the hard way, in a similar situation. We ran into each other at a party. Because, again, you're declaring to an old friend that you're prepared to disregard his feelings. And I think she wants to take it to the next level, too. You've got a hell of a decision to make. You're always going to feel weird when you see your ex, at least a little bit. I can't stop thinking about her. It's going to hurt even if you say all the nice things you should say — that you're still going to be his friend, that you're going to try not to Instagram this girl obsessively, etc. Flirting with each other was easy, taking each other's clothes off was easy, and it felt like fate — like absolute magic — and it kept feeling like absolute magic for about a month, at which point I discovered that she was kind of boring, or at least that we bored each other. If you're currently lonely and you really need to get laid, consider that maybe you're just desperate. What we do know is that he is really, really good at dating. The problem is, my friend had a deep relationship with this girl, and I think he's still kind of in love with her. Those two things are so, so easily confused. Tell your friend about your intentions, and ask him if there's any way you can make the process easier for him. If you're still friends with your ex , it wasn't that serious, or it's still serious. All of those old wounds stick around, just waiting to be re-opened. This conversation will not go well. I suspected that she had a low-key crush on me.
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